The End is Nigh…the future’s so bright I’ve gotta wear shades….

It’s 5.45am on the 26th of October in Bury St Edmunds Hospital, where I’ve spent 36 days and nights since the 8th of July, 2018. During that time an eternity has passed. I’ve spent 576 hours being on the receiving end of poison being directly injected into my heart through tubes injected directly into my veins through each of my arms (they came out and had to be re-inserted) so that now I have one inserted through my neck that comes out of my chest like some type of weird Borg third nipple with two ways to get the fluids.

I’ve had countless needles, inspections every four hours of every day, prodding, poking, and otherwise invasive inspections. I almost died early on of dehydration (not fun) and again due to a bit too aggressive treatment regime after amazing success discovered while I was in Purgatory the first time.

I’ve had 864 hours of isolation to think about me. I’ve had four and a half months of forced retirement with no income (actually a small bit). I’ve cried a lot (my emotions have been running rampant), I’ve complained a lot, I’ve been in a lot of pain (not big on it) and most of all the only thing keeping me going is remembering my own trainings and applying them to me (goal visualisation and short term, long term goals actually works.) But, for the first time in sixty years 90%  of it was about ME and MY future (if I have one).

As I will leave through these doors I hope I will have a new chance at a new life. Doug Miller died in here. Douga (pronounced Dougie) will now take off. Almost 40 years ago I made a choice and so did Ray Gordon – (he hired me and become my partner for a while). He took a chance and saw something in me – I’ll never forget that and will always be thankful. This gave me chance to enjoy a career (no, create a career), to travel the world, to help Owners, to meet thousands of good people (and a few shits), teach people what I knew and I learned daily from them how to do things better. I thank them all for accepting me, accommodating me often and putting up with my attitudes.

A lot of people think that I am too aggressive, too arrogant, too ‘over the top‘. They are mistaking my confidence for this – I apologise for not explaining better and perhaps being a bit intolerant. I had a gift, (I think); I can see things that others can’t or don’t want to; from all of the work I’ve done by presenting at dozens of conferences globally, teaching thousands of salespeople the Sales Makers System that I developed over the years with input from a lot of people, presenting to tens of thousands of eager ears and resulting in the sales of memberships to millions of customers (now called members.) This is my Legacy – not a bad one. Few people can claim the same. My gift is that I can see what can be and create a path to get there…with that system I created called Sales Makers System – I now call this X-Selling!

So, it is with great remorse that I have decided to end this plain of existence and I officially announce that I am now FULLY RETIRED from the Industry that I have loved as Sales Makers International. It is now relegated to the annals of history. I hope history is gentle on me…. I tried to give the best in me, the passion in me, the best advice and always tell the truth (got me a lot of grief and negative results for me – but, it was the right thing to do.)

I thank all of you that I met and I loved all of you in my own way.  I’ve beeen overwhelmed by the outpouring of love, respect, compliments, praise, support, encouragement I’ve gotten from you; my readers, friends, neighbors and colleagues. THANK YOU! I couldn’t have gotten to where I am now without you – you’ve helped me stay positive, strong and determined. IMPEACH THE ALIEN TRUMP!

My life is going to be different, very different for however long I’ve got left (Thanksgiving Day is when I learn my fate and I will inform the world on Black Friday of my future.)

I can tell you now that even though you will never see me walk through the doors of your Club or Centre to work – some of you WILL see me again and I going to conduct TWO last LIVE performances, lectures, events next year. I’ve been living in England for over twenty years – I will be doing ONE LAST PUBLIC APPEARANCE in the UK on the 29th and 30th of November at the National Fitness Awards at the Athena in Leicester.

I would like to invite anyone that would like to say hello and goodbye to join me for a Margarita (MY recipe) from 5-7pm on the 29th of November at my suite at my hotel. Afterwards we’ll casually enjoy an Indian somewhere once I know who’s’ coming.    Please RSVP to: if you would like to attend. 

IF you are attending the National Fitness Awards Golf Day the next day (30th of November) you’ll see me and a man I hired when I first landed on these shores – Adrian Marks (of Enjoy! Marketing), he was my second in the first Sales Makers Impact Team. He left to spread his wings and has soared with a most successful Digital Marketing Company. As I enter retirement, I will now join him in a Bored Role giving some sage advice and insultancy with his company (turnabout is fair play). Adrian and I will be on the course to meet, chat and offer some treats to enjoy the Golf Day, the Sales Makers way and you’ll have to put up with Chemo Doug (I’m not the man you remember) and not the one you’ll see in six months when I come out of Rejuvenation. (If you see me again.)  I am after all; still an immature 68 year-old Clone, undergoing experimental Medical Marijuana treatment and won’t fully develop for another few months. (That’s why I’m going to Spain for the Winter.)

Speaking of Spain: I will be giving a LIVE presentation on the 12th of July – 16th July, 2019 on a Ferry Cruise from Rome to Barcelona and back. I will be giving my last Seminar on X-Selling @ Membership Sales (the title of my new book and Podcast Series [my hobby]. There will be two English-speaking Presenters going and two coming back (Alumnus from my RoadShows). We expect a Full Boat (300) since it’s VERY inexpensive. The Organiser is Andrea Pambianchi of Fitness Network Italia and they will be cooperating with a Spanish partner to be announced in the new year. This is VERY advance notice and will not be marketed until the New Year (interested in joining us –      I’d love to have a bunch of friends on board to Sale with… THIS IS THE OFFICAL BOAT/BOOK LAUNCH OF X-SELLING @ MEMBERSHIP SALES!
This will be my last LIVE performance in Europe….

MY OPENING FAREWELL will be held on October 12, 2019 in Orlando, Florida in co-operation with the ICAA (International Council on Active Aging) Conference held from the 9th – 12th October with a full programme of Education and a Trade Show. Enourmous thanks to Colin and Julie Milner for tolerating (I mean hosting) this event.

THIS WILL BE A VIRTUAL ROAD SHOW, streamed live at 10am EST, and simulcast at 10am PST, 10am GMT, etc….As I enter Full Retirement – I’m dragging a few of my old friends OUT of Retirement to join me on the stage ONE LAST TIME (we’re putting the Band back together) I’ll mention just ONE confirmed = 77-year-old Retiree (with more energy in her little finger than I’ve got in my entire body – now)     SANDY COFFMAN IHRSA’s & Club Industry’s No 1 Presenter for over a Decade! CONFIRMED!                 It will also be professionally recorded.               The others will also blow your mind!

X-SELLING @ MEMBERSHIP SALES will be a Hard Bound, Limited Edition (1,000 books). This is not an auto-Biography (There will be tons of stories), this is a Sales & Marketing Manual to explain in detail what I did, how I did it, why I did it – revealing secrets I never thought I’d tell anyone...and a history book outlining my four decades in the Fitness Industry in North America and then Europe and the World, (oh yeah; more stories.) In addition: there will be full graphic images of ALL of my campaigns and promotions. Also, every X-SELLING Book includes unlimited access (for your staff) to the Audio Book and eBook version. The Website and PRE-PRE Sale* begins 5 January (although I’ve actually sold the first seventeen.

PRE-PRE Sale*        5 January – 12 March   NO Money Down – just Reserve!

PRE-Sale*                 13 March – 31 May       10% Deposit – 10 Day Money Back Guarantee

LAST ORDERS*       1 June – 11 July              Last Chance to get Bonus X-Selling Chapters

BOAT/BOOK LAUNCH          12 July                One Convention Cruise – Rome > Barcelona

*X-SELLING BONUS CHAPTERS                            A few of my friends and RoadShow Alumnus X-perts have generously agreed to contribute a chapter on their X-pertise, so; you’ll have: Sandy Coffman on Programming for Profit, Frank Furness on Social media Marketing, Dr Paul Bedford on Retention, Colin Milner on Marketing to the Aging PopulationAdrian Marks on Digital Marketing and more to be announced. This is your Bonus for purchasing during the Pre-Sales & Last Orders.                    This MAY be sold separately AFTER the BOAT/BOOK LAUNCH!

There will be 100 Italian and 100 Spanish Versions (you also get the English) that will be available ONLY on the BOAT/BOOK LAUNCH!

After X-SELLING is gone (1,000 copies) it’s gone!                                                                    The eBook and the Audio Book will be available (for a fee – TBA.)

PODFATHER OF MEMBERSHIP SALES                    I will be producing a 20-minute weekly Podcast supporting the book, answering questions from readers to clarify things and also more tips on sales and marketing and how to X-Sell!       This is also included for one year, but will be available on individual Podcast Channels and on a Subscription basis.                 It will launch on June 1st – 11 July           FREE  before the BOAT/BOOK LAUNCH!

I think that’s enough for one POST. This is what happens when I get to think about me and what I want to accomplish. When they told me I had three months to live – my first thought was: That’s not enough time to do what I want to do!”

The NHS programme and staff and treatment have given me a new lease on life (in America I’d be dead now – because I couldn’t afford it.) I’m taking this time to finish what I started – as a hobby! After the OPENING FAREWELL VIRTUAL ROADSHOW in October.  I will be going on an extended World Tour for a few months visiting friends, fulfilling my Bucket list of: Machu Picchu, Sailing Tahiti, revisiting Bali, walking on the Great Wall of China and have an American meal with an American friend on Chinese New Year in Beijing, Vietnam, viewing the Pyramids from the Nile and back to Mill House, Hitcham…. All in fourteen months.

Tomorrow, however; is a sad day: I’m selling my 1991 Harley Davidson Sportster to my neighbor (I have been promised visiting rights and an occasional ride.) BUT, I will be replacing her in June in Milwaukee with a NEW 2019 Harley Davidson TriGlide Ultra.             images June 16, 2019 – Sunrise / Father’s Day, Chicago, Illinois to Long Beach, California.  2019 FATHER SON ROUTE 66 ROAD TRIP. I’m on my Trike, Ian’s driving the support vehicle with Camping equipment.

If anyone else wants to join us – my oldest friend from America, my oldest friend from Norway, my neighbor from Mill House & Sons are gonna do a week (We’re going for three). Bikes, Trucks, Mustang convertibles of all description can be rented….Of course, daughters, wives, partners welcome also…                A Bucket List item checked off.

This has been an eye opener for me –

  • Live each day like there’s no tomorrow – because, there might not be.
  • Tell everyone you care about how you feel – because, you might not get another chance.
  • Have fun every day and bring laughter in your life and those around you – laughter truly is the best medicine. (Otherwise, I would’ve cried every day!)
  • Take small bites (goals) and achieve them so you can eat the whole elephant!
  • You can’t take it with you – but; who says you can’t take memories.

NOTE: I was going to end this Shit-Happens.Blog when I completed this process and concluded the treatment. I’m actually enjoying this hobby and it seems a few of you are too. SO, I am planning on revealing the Black Friday results to y’all, but it’s up to you to tell me what you want. I am willing to continue telling the Story (I may get Remission, but I will die of Cancer some day.) You tell me Stop OR Keep on Truckin’?


PS   I’m on the final flush waiting for final clearance – LIFE, Here I come! 

17 thoughts on “The End is Nigh…the future’s so bright I’ve gotta wear shades….

Add yours

  1. What a life and career you’ve had… amazing! So great catching up tonight Uncle Douga (pronounced Dougie). Definitely keep writing the blog- I can’t wait to hear about your adventures. Hoping you start to feel a bit more comfortable now. Love you ❤❤❤


  2. Keep on truckin’, Douga! I love reading your blog! The more I read your posts, the more I understand why I perceived you as a true friend since the first time I spoke to you, in Brussels, 2000 or 2001.


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